TUNNELS

my body

my heart

my mind

my soul

what is in them?

so many things want to come out.

i've carried these chains since BIRTH

a barrier of protection

from myself

from me hurting others

Is this just who I am?

or is it just the same challenges i've become so familiar with?

she affects me

he affects me

it affects me

they affect me

I affect me

thoughts, oh these thoughts.

these fantasies.

i don't need an escape or a bandaid.

I need a way through.

a tunnel

a tunnel through the grim, bile and muck.

through the gold, glitter and shimmer.

a tunnel through what I desire, fear, hate, crave, love, have and don't have.

No, not a way out.

A way across.

The experience is not to be avoided.

It is my path of knowledge and wisdom...

but not without the pain or regret.

If only the people I fear could accept and understand me..

and let me go